.courageous leadership introspective analysis.
I came across this essay that I wrote in March 2003. The church leadership was reading Courageous Leadership by Bill Hybels in our Leadership Development Program. Afterwards, I wrote an essay reflecting on how the content of the book relates to my life personally. Enjoy!
My recent marriage eight months ago has placed me in a very unique situation among the leadership of the church. Prior to my marriage and during my graduate career, I was a ministry maniac, heavily involved in teaching, homegroup leading, coaching, organizing, and vision casting. However, since getting married, I have flexed my “no” muscle much more frequently. My decision not to be involved in church leadership during the first year of my marriage was perhaps the wisest ministry decision I’ve ever made. Oleah is and always will be my number one human priority, and I’m thankful that I’m able to focus my time and energy into developing a marriage centered on Christ. The time off from church leadership has also allowed me to mature my personal relationship with Christ in ways beyond measure. Perhaps the most important aspect of this time regarding leadership is the opportunity to analyze my leadership philosophies and to dissect those abilities and talents that I have been given.
Reading Courageous Leadership by Bill Hybels has allowed me to take a provocative look into my leadership tendencies. I was hooked from the very beginning as he described how the future of the world rests in the hands of local congregations. “The local church is the hope of the world and its future rests primarily in the hands of its leaders. The outcome of the redemptive drama being played out on planet Earth will be determined by how well church leaders lead.” We live in a morally decrepit world. What changes can be made to improve it? Governments, despite their best interests, are limited and conflicting. Secular organizations provide logistic support, while never getting to the roots of the problems. The church, then, has the ability to transform human souls, and thereby transform societies and consequently the world. Therefore we must each do our part to maximize the transforming capacity of the church. For me, that means understanding my particular role in the church and subjecting my abilities to the utmost scrutiny.
Perhaps the most sobering aspect of courageous leadership is associated with vision. Before the international ministry had begun, I had a vision for a ministry that barely existed in the mind of one staff member of the church. My passion fueled this vision, and this vision was contagious. Now, I thank God for the resulting diversity that exists in our church. The same is true for the scientific creationism class. My passion for the subject drove my dedication into preparing the material. As people walk away from the class with deep reverence and awe for our Creator, I am again, sincerely gratified for God guiding my vision. What is sobering about the aspect of vision is that I don’t have one right now. I write the former examples because I can testify to experiencing the drive and the passion. For whatever reason unbeknownst to me, I do not presently have a vision for my life and ministry. This is and will continue to be one of my most fervent prayer requests, for vision is the “most potent weapon in a leader’s arsenal…the weapon that unleashes the power of the church.” Those previous visions came to me like an epiphany; God gave me the vision immediately and I was ready to do it. But now, I believe, He is allowing pieces of the complex puzzle to come into focus piece by piece. I pray for discernment and clarity in understanding what this vision is. I realize that now is likely the best time for establishing this vision for my ministry, my family, and myself.
Another crucial aspect of leadership is understanding my leadership style. As I examine the ten styles that are presented, I consider the strategic and managing styles to describe my leadership. Perhaps my empirical mind lends itself best to the strategic style, where a predetermined sequence of events (experiments) is followed to achieve a vision (conclusion). I rather enjoy the challenge of taking a vision and strategizing on the most effective means to reach this vision. Similarly, my background in academia, government, and corporate life provides support for a managing leadership style. Hybels would describe me as a leader who “salivates at the thought of bringing order out of chaos.” Decreasing the entropy of a system, whether human or molecular, is one of my fortes indeed. As I assess these styles in my leadership, my next measure would include discussing these with others and discovering with other church leaders where my talents could best be utilized.
As I relate to others and sense their relationship with God, I am led to analyze the leaders’ pathways. My pathway is intellectual. My mind must be fully engaged for spiritual progress. I came to Christ after contemplating the scientific evidences that point to a world that was created, not evolved. My mind needed to be convinced before my heart was opened. I parallel author Lee Strobel; what feeds my soul is reading theology, history, archaeology, and scientific journals. In understanding what propels me toward Christ, I must also appreciate and develop other spiritual pathways. I want to experience Christ with others through the relational pathway, labor with the serving pathway, quiet myself to develop the contemplative and worship pathways, get busy with an activist pathway, and of course, appreciate our Creator in the creation pathway. All are important, and each would help to maximize my spiritual growth.
Further analysis of my leadership leads me to the three C’s of team selection—character, competence, and chemistry, in that order—and applying these to my personal relationship with Christ. When I was heavily involved in ministry, I elevated competence to the highest level and consequently compromised my character. My character was catastrophically contaminated, causing me to step out of leadership for a short time. During that time I was able to recommit myself to spiritual disciplines that drew me closer to God. As I was later given more responsibility, I had developed continuing patterns of consistency. Currently, I am convicted about never compromising my character. Regardless of circumstances, my relationship with God should always be kept priority. I can then examine my competence—how my gifts are congruent with the church’s needs. Finally, I can consider chemistry, my relationships and rapport with other kingdom builders.
Conceivably the most significant, radical, and steady growth in my relationship with God has transpired in the last eight months. More accurately, the last four months. Why? My relationship with God was not subjected to open discussion, as was the case during my tenure as a homegroup leader. Because of my desire to portray a “good ol’ boy” type of leader, I often used that false depiction as a front. This inaccurate delineation of my character caused me to be a superficial leader. I cannot stress the importance of character. The rekindling of my heart to God’s the past several months can be attributed to my regular time with God without any expectations that I would use issues in my life to teach others. My devotion to God is exactly that…mine. The core of it all is self-leadership. Although I need to influence those around me—leaders, peers, and those under my leadership alike—much of my time should be devoted to self. Thankfully, my energies have been focused on me. I must learn to lead myself before I can lead others. “David strengthened himself in the Lord his God” (1 Samuel 30:6) and so must I. I boast in the Lord (1 Corinthians 1:30), for He is in the process of answering my prayer of last December for deeper intimacy. Ultimately, my focus is on Christ. I desire to develop my talents for the effectiveness of His church, for it is through this church that the world will change.